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Responsible Dominance

1. It is important to be able to have trust. A sub’s submission is a gift and not something to be taken lightly, and abused. It is a dominants responsibility not to break, abuse, or violate that trust that a submissive has placed in a dominant. When decisions need to be made within the relationship or the scene, a dominant must keep both the submissive and themselves in mind, and not just themselves. This would equate to a selfish dominant that has no interest or care in the relationship with their submissive. A submissive needs to trust, if they do not trust they might not approach a certain activity or scene in mind. A submissive needs to have the ability to assure themselves that what they’re doing is in safe hands, and that if something goes wrong, their dominant will be there for them.

2. It is a responsibility of the dominant to help the submissive find their way. To recognise the sub’s needs and desires and to help facilitate that. It is not the responsibility of the dominant to force their own fantasies and desires onto the sub, unless they coincide with each other.

3. A dominant must always be in control. To lose control of their emotions and to take anger out on a sub is not a BDSM relationship, but it is abuse. If a dominant is not in control of their own emotions, then they cannot possibly be in control of another individual.

4. Communication is a key component to being a dominant. A dominant cannot read between the lines the desires of their submissive, and they must clearly work out their sub’s needs and desires. A dominant must also communicate back to the sub and clearly explain, define and set boundaries and rules that are appropriate to the scene, relationship, or situation.

5. Safety is paramount. It is a dominants responsibility to ensure that their submissive is safe. A dominant must be responsible for finding out ones true limits, and then sticking to those limits to ensure the safety of all.

Responsibilities of the Dominant

22 BDSM Rules - Training